Friday, 1 November 2013

Do you ever really conquer your fears? Or just learn to deal with them?


Fear is a funny thing, it has a way of working its way through your thoughts. I have found it often stems from one thing but then spills over into all the different areas of your life and manifests itself into something worlds away from the initial cause.

Everyone experience fear throughout their lives, if you are like me it will be a weekly occurrence but I guess it’s how you deal with it that makes the difference. Fear is a natural thing, we can fear the unknown, the future, change in personal or professional circumstances often sparks fear so how do we learn to deal with it and not let it take over…  For me fear has a great habit of leading me to have those one sided conversations in my head which turn into a much bigger deal than the original source. So rather than voicing my fear and tackling it head on I shy away, almost hiding from it hoping it will just pass. Although you would think after 29years I would have learned that hiding from your fear is the worst thing you can do, it doesn’t go away, it is always there and eventually it comes back and I have to deal with it!

For anyone who has been reading ‘My little yoga buzz’ you will be very familiar with my fall on my face incident trying to do a forearm balance in the middle of a studio. What a journey it has been to get to a stage where I can now balance in pincha without the security of the wall… So many learning’s came from that one class and fall. Not letting my ego onto the mat, staying true to my own practice and not to feel intimidated with what other people / teachers expect or ask me to do in a class- this one was a particular struggle. But most importantly for me I think was the positive impact it has had on my teaching. For anyone who hasn’t read my blog before that was a short recap, we are all on the same page now!!

A few weeks ago I wrote about conquering my fear and finally getting my forearm balance, all be it in my own sitting room…. I honestly thought I had mastered the pose and was over the whole incident. However last week I had a real challenge. I was sitting outside a studio waiting to go into class, I was really looking forward to the class, I had heard a lot about the teacher and although I hadn’t tried her class before I had met her a few times and just knew I would love her teaching style. It was a teachers class, I didn’t really know what to expect but whilst I was passing the time on my phone I looked up and saw another teacher waiting for the class just like me…. Whilst I was sitting she was hanging out in handstand- very impressive but also slightly intimidating! The class began and just as I had imagined Mollie was a fabulous teacher, she has a great presence about her a lovely start to the class …. Then it happened! ‘Lets work into Pincha’- my body went into a cold sweat…. I could feel my heart racing, my skin getting clamy and I just knew my face was like a tomato. I had no control over it!

Here I was in the centre of the room, forearms on the mat, déjà vu, and fear was jumping all over me! So I sat up and spoke, I shared my previous experience and fear with the room. I wasn’t prepared to let me ego take over again, so I asked for help. It was very obvious to everyone in the room, none of whom I had met before, that I was nervousand rather than laugh or judge me they encouraged and supported me, before I knew it I was hanging out in pincha…. And loving it! ‘Learn to fall’ they told me, ‘practice falling’ – now I’m not going to lie this sounded crazy to me. When I got to that lovely balance place in pincha why would I fall out of it??? But this was the best advice they could have given me…. It turns out I was not afraid of the pose but of the fall! Over the last few months I have been focusing on achieving the pose rather than dealing with the real fear…. The fall!!!

So for the last week that’s exactly what I have done… I work into my pincha and then I fall. It was a bit strange to start but now…. I am quite the falling pro. Have I really conquered my fear now?…. Who knows. No doubt there will be more learnings on this journey and plenty of falls. But I do know voicing my fear was nowhere near as scary as I thought it would be!

Feel the fear and do it anyway!

www.facebook.com/EllaBelleYoga
www.twitter.com/ellabelleyoga


No comments:

Post a Comment