What happens when you look in the mirror?

Following my month intensive yoga training I am absolutely loving my new routine and am sticking to my morning practice! I get up early and go for a big walk grabbing a coffee on the way back, sifting through emails and following up on anything I need to do before I step onto my mat for my morning practice. I’m sure that might raise a few eyebrows but I love my morning coffee and I find if I go for a walk or jog in the morning it wakes my body up so that when I step on the mat I am not yawning, or distracted by my to do list!

Sticking to my daily self practice hasn’t proved difficult at all, I was a bit nervous that it would be hard to stay motivated without the class of people around me but as I have discovered over the month my whole attitude to yoga changed- in many ways. So instead of having to make time to get onto the mat, my yoga practice is now a standard part of my day and everything else fits around it.

One of the challenges I have faced however, is the fine balance of listening to my body, working to what it needs on any given day and also pushing myself. Last week I found myself easing out of poses and maybe taking a modification – out of habit rather than listening to how my body really felt. So the balance had tipped in the other way- when I realized this I just laughed to myself- typical me! I had gone from the extreme of pushing my body too far, compromising the pose to try to reach the deepest option given by the teacher to pulling back and taking the modifications given. Now, this is not a bad thing but I was missing the point. Modifications and props are great. Learning to bend my knees in downward dog dramatically changed my yoga practice- I remember trying this throughout a whole class and having a serious wow moment but by doing this I have now gotten my alignment right and can straighten my legs….sometimes I just forget to go into the full pose.

So I tried to focus on each posture and see what felt right and really listen to how each pose felt- which was great, but I was loosing the flow…. So I got a mirror! Genius…. Now I do my practice beside the mirror, without over thinking I can see where I am compromising the pose or going too deep, I can also see how I am improving in areas and it is absolutely inspiring my teaching. By watching how my body moves and feels at the same time it has given a whole new depth to my teaching. It is like I am my own student, yes it does involve talking to myself the odd time but I’m good with that.

I don’t stare in the mirror the whole time, I don’t need to, but it is like my prop. I think no matter how aware you are of your body by using a mirror it will open your eyes and give you a new perspective on your own yoga practice. It also really helped me with the movement between poses, analyzing the transition and keeping that fluid too. Whether you are a yoga teacher or not it doesn’t matter I really recommend you try doing some yoga with a big mirror so you can check yourself out. Now I know looking in a mirror can be a bit daunting and the idea of looking at your body in so much detail might be a bit intimidating- unfortunately I don’t have a miracle cure. But I do understand and I can share my own insecurities, which hopefully will encourage you to give it a go.

I used to really struggle with looking in the mirror, I used to put my make up on in low light and then do a quick check that there was no big streaks or mascara smudges under my eyes and then walk away from the mirror. For me it was a really scary thing, I over analysed and criticized every part of me and constantly felt the need to pull my tummy in or hide behind big sunglasses. Do you know what I learned from this- it is so tiring and it wastes a lot of time…. So I decided to try something new. Looking in the mirror and instead of worrying about the little things I would change I consciously highlighted what I liked (this was a challenging process to start) but I stuck with it and got to a place where I can look in the mirror now and I see me.

So maybe start with doing yoga with a mirror and really get to know your body, from a different angle, use the mirror to help you to get into the perfect pose for you and go easy on yourself. Praise yourself as you progress, laugh when you fall and if you notice yourself frowning- smile! 

What's your Yoga philosophy?

Before I did my yoga teacher training I had my reservations about ‘Yoga Philosophy’…. I have never been a philosophy person, or so I thought. It was only during the course that I started to realize that, as with the question “What is Yoga?’, the philosophy of yoga is a very personal and individual topic with an unlimited array of possible explanations. So when we were asked to write our own yoga philosophy, with no limits or restrictions…. This is what I came up with….

Yoga is a journey of the self, through the self to the self- The Bhagavad Gita

For me this quote says it all. A personal journey with no time restrictions, physical demands or defined goals….. It brings the focus inwards, develops the awareness and teaches you to listen to your body and loose the ego once you step onto your mat.

My yoga philosophy:

• ·      YOU space
  ·      Own Voice
  ·      Getting to know you
  ·      Accepting you today

YOU space

It is a journey and it will be different for everyone but for me the important thing to remember is that there is no finish line or ultimate goal. For me yoga began as a need to satisfy an inner curiosity. I started with self practice and flash cards falling around my bedroom trying to twist my body into different shapes and angles and getting frustrated when it all didn’t quite come together- this was the battle with my ego. I soon learned that when I stepped onto the mat all I needed to think of was my mat space. Your mat- is your space, whether you are in a class of 100 people or in a room on your own - it’s all about you!

Own Voice

So many people spend so much time running away from that little voice in their heads, we are too busy with life and looking after other people that we neglect or ignore what our own voice is saying. Yoga is about finding that inner voice, having the confidence to be true to it and the commitment to yourself to practice it. There is no gold medal for being the best in your first class; yoga is more of a lifetime achievement award.

 Getting to know you

By creating YOU space and listening to your inner voice you will start to become aware of your body. Learning about your body by working through each area in different poses and pranayama, discovering your strengths and challenges. By bringing the focus into your space and leaving the ego off the mat you will let your body guide you to your limitations and also show you how and when to push them.

Accepting you today

Yoga is a journey and every day is different. Every time you get onto the mat you need to create YOU space, listen to your voice, become aware of how your body feels at that moment, for that practice and then accept you, as you are in that moment.

As a teacher this is the philosophy I want to teach my students by. I understand that for a lot of people who come to Yoga classes it is about the physical movement and challenges and they don’t realize the importance of these four points in order to get the most out of their practice.

Throughout my classes I would like my students to take the time on their mat as ‘Me time’, learn to listen to that inner voice, develop that awareness in their bodies and accept themselves for how they are at that particular moment on that particular day. 

https://www.facebook.com/EllaBelleYoga

Don't take you for granted!

Here I am at the end of week 4 and I can’t believe it’s all over. What a month…. When I walked into the studio on that first day I was filled with a mix of nerves, excitement and hope. Hope that I would find the reassurance I was searching for that I had made the right decision leaving my job as a marketing manager and swapping my stilettos for bare feet and my yoga mat! Yesterday I walked out of that same studio filled with nerves, excitement and confidence…. Confident in my decision to leave my job and follow my dream, confident in my ability as a yoga teacher but above all- confident in me!

My biggest learning curve in the last month did not come from the physical poses, Sanskrit terms or even philosophy; it came from me…. Learning to love me! It sounds so simple but as I learned sometimes the most important things get taken for granted and forgotten about. Realising this is, in itself, a challenge but the hard part is changing your actions to make you number one again, that reassurance I was searching for needed to come from me. 

So yeah, looking back, it was a challenging month; physically- because I was doing up to 4 hours of strong practice a day, which my body wasn’t used to but it was a good kind of body aching and tiredness. Knowing I was working my body hard, getting stronger and also developing my practice, gave me the extra energy I needed to get out of bed every day. Mentally – every day I left feeling like my brain was at maximum capacity learning about the history and philosophy of yoga but somehow each day I was able to push it a little bit further and fit more information in. I was ready for the yoga overload, I thought the philosophy elements would be the toughest bits for me but I was so wrong. Now, I’m not the biggest philosophy fan but I like that I have come away from the training with a deeper understanding on the roots of yoga the various paths and history. But by far the most difficult part of the course was the emotional challenges I faced personally- I was not prepared for this.

About half way through the course I hit a wall- I felt totally lost and wondered what I was doing, I taught a session one morning and it just didn’t feel right… I was starting to panic. Then a very good friend of mine literally pressed the pause button on the whirlwind of thoughts in my head and put some sense back in. He helped me to take a step back and see that I was just getting wrapped up in everyone’s emotions around me, I was loosing focus on me, my goals and my true feelings. I was worrying too much about what I ‘should’ be saying or what I ‘shouldn’t’ be doing and I was loosing the ME part in teaching. I quickly snapped out of it and started to enjoy every day and focus on each day. I stopped worrying about the exam at the end of it, what I needed to know and didn’t and instead I looked at what I could learn each day from the wonderful teachers and other students around me.

Above all, I started listening to me and doing what I needed to do to make me happy. I realized what was holding me back and what was frustrating me, myself! I needed to start loving me…. Now some people might see that as a crazy statement and I’m sure a few eyebrows will be raised. But if you think about it, it is very simple…. If you do not love yourself how can you love something else or give it your all? If you are constantly trying to make yourself look better, not just physically but even in the eyes of other people you loose focus on what is important, you loose focus on you. I needed to put me first… It is not about being selfish, it is about being true to myself. So this is what I am doing, it is difficult. By nature I am a yes person but slowly I am learning sometime no is the right answer. This also comes onto the mat…. As the weeks went on and we had our morning practice and the teacher suggested going deeper if we felt like it… I gave myself the option, sometimes I took the deeper posture and sometimes I didn’t. But whatever pose I did, I committed to it and that gave me a better sense of achievement than being in a pose and feeling pain or counting the breaths until I could release. However, by not being so hard on my body I strangely found my practice really improved!

So I left the studio yesterday for the last time filled with mixed emotions,

Sad that this part of the journey is over, Relief to have finished and passed my exams, Excitement looking to the next stage in this journey but above all Happy- really really happy and proud of me; knowing that I have achieved the first part of my dream, it is a reality and now I can start living it! 

For daily yoga bites like my facebook page: www.facebook.com/EllaBelleYoga

Hello Mat.... Goodbye Ego!

As I am coming to the end of my 1-month intensive yoga training course I am looking back over the last 4 weeks with mixed emotions. It has definitely been intense but also challenging physically, emotionally and mentally. I was ready for the yoga overload but I don’t think I was prepared for the personal journey and challenges I have faced. Being so immersed in something can cause you to loose clarity on other things, I definitely got a little lost along the way and got too wrapped up in the final goal but luckily I was given a reality check and found my focus again.

Writing my final week summary, reflecting over what I have learnt on this personal journey really got me thinking about how my whole attitude towards yoga has developed and changed along with my practice since I first stepped on the mat in my bedroom about 7 years ago. It also made me realize the impact my ‘of the mat’ life has on my ‘on the mat’ practice.

Actually that first time I tried yoga I don’t even think I had a mat…. I just did it in my bedroom with the TV on in the background and looking at picture cards of poses with written and visual cues. There was about 70 cards in the pack and I was done in about 40minutes- looking back I don’t think I can even call it yoga, more of a ‘lets see how quick I can get my body in and out of these poses and definitely leaving out the last ones lying on the ground (Savasna)! So I did this once or twice a week for a month or two and couldn’t really understand what the fuss was about at all. I remember thinking I am just not the yoga type but a friend of mine dragged me along to a yoga class and I decided I’d give it one last shot- that inner competitive streak!

My first class on a yoga mat in a studio was not a life changing experience but it was the start of a new interest in yoga and a realization of my true ability rather than my own home yoga style! I actually got a bit frustrated with the teacher in that first class, she kept taking me out of poses and making me bend my knees, shorten my stance etc. For the first half of the class I felt a bit like a puppet and didn’t really know what was going on, but then I started to notice that this yoga stuff was actually tough and my muscles were really working and shaking….. so what had I been doing??!!

That first class definitely got my curiosity going and I started going to classes regularly, although I still was not getting the part at the end of class where you had to lie flat on the mat and relax. Savasna and I had a little bit of a battle for the first year, I could try to make up lots reasons for it but honestly, it is quite simple, I couldn’t give myself me time. I didn’t value relaxation time; in my head I did that when I slept. Looking back my practice was very intense, I went 6 days a week and did hot power yoga and I loved challenging my body- my yoga practice absolutely matched my life. I was working at a ridiculous pace, constantly rushing and never seemed to have enough time to do the simple things. Everything I did had to be at a really fast or intense pace and where I was trying to prove myself in my work life I was doing the same on my mat, ego played a huge part.

I decided to train to be a pregnancy yoga teacher and then a mum & baby yoga teacher about 3 years ago and this was a big turning point in my own yoga practice. Initially I was a bit skeptical about how these classes would work and if the clients would get enough from the classes. But I absolutely loved it and this really calmed me down in my own yoga classes and slowly but surely in my day to day life. Now, I was still working at a crazy pace but I was slowly learning about me time and how yoga was the perfect opportunity to take advantage of me time.

How much of your life affects your practice? When you are having a bad day or land on your mat after a stressful day at work does that impact on your practice or can you take off your shoes, leave your ego and any stress or worry at the door and stand on your mat as you, the real you and choose you as your intention for your class? Bringing just me to the mat was a big challenge for me and sometimes I still find it hard to be in the present. I used to catch myself thinking about the day ahead or the previous events of the week and have that guilty look on my face as if the teacher knows I am not ‘in the moment’! Now, my mind still wanders and I regularly have to bring myself back to my mat space, but that’s ok, for me it’s more important that I have left my ego at the door and my practice is all about me!

For daily yoga bites go to: https://www.facebook.com/EllaBelleYoga